The day I found out I was pregnant for the first time ever was easily one of the happiest times in my entire life. However, this elation was quickly overshadowed by breaking news the following day of the COVID pandemic.
One of the happiest moments of my life was immediately followed by one of the most uncertain.
I was scheduled to work from home that day but was called into an emergency meeting with the rest of the hospital public relations team. Not knowing what to do and with so many unknowns surrounding something that was rapidly spreading, I decided it was in my best interest (and the interest of my unborn child) to stay home. After all, I was able to do my work 100% remotely – so why risk it?
My decision to openly dismiss a directive was immediately questioned and I was pressured into revealing my pregnancy news prematurely to my workplace, long before I even had a chance to process it myself or tell loved ones. I felt robbed of a special and intimate moment in my life that I’ll never be able to get back, and I struggled to reconcile how I could continue to work for an employer I once genuinely loved but who now left me feeling completely unsupported and disheartened.
I felt robbed of a special and intimate moment in my life that I’ll never be able to get back.
The flexibility that wasn’t there
Ultimately, despite my role being one in which I could have worked from home (at least in the interim, given my situation), there was no “remote” option allowed. Beyond the usual stresses of pregnancy, I was also navigating being pregnant during a pandemic. The compromise was driving 30 minutes to the office and being able to shut my door and take meetings over the phone.
I worked until the day I delivered, and as my maternity leave waned, I deliberated over the pros and cons of going back to work right away, what that might look like, childcare, and my desire to actively be there for my little one during this fleeting period of their life.
I knew the chances were slim to none in realizing some sort of hybrid work situation with my employer, but there was also the fear of what sorts of job opportunities I might have on the other end of it all.
Rebuilding my career on my own terms
In the end, I amicably parted ways with my employer and on the heels of big life changes during such a tremendous time of uncertainty in the world, I was able to successfully start my own consulting business. During a season of my life where all I had been asking for was a little flexibility and empathy, I was able to find it by forging my own path.
It’s not that I didn’t want to work. The problem was that I DID want to work but the options for flexibility just weren’t there.
As The Atlantic noted in “One Big Benefit of Remote Work,” the pandemic became “a stress test of sorts, proving to families that they can do hard things.”
What the pandemic revealed
As difficult as the pandemic has been, I wouldn’t change a thing. It has challenged me in ways that have made me a better person. Perhaps, most importantly, it has opened up wonderful opportunities for other educated women seeking greater flexibility while balancing careers and caregiving.
What resonated with you?